Heavier, but not defeated.

Yo, 1-2 1-2..

Weird way to start a blog, but I’m listening to the Insecure season 1 soundtrack

issa-rae-insecure-poster

Currently my favorite series.

and I’m feeling good.

This is despite the fact that I’ve gained 30lbs. That’s right 30 lbs. And now, I stand at a good 170lbs. I was upset this morning – not going to front – but am I defeated? No sir. Because in some weird way I am motivated. Like a real fire. Seriously. I know, I know, I’ve been on kind of slump but that doesn’t mean I have to stay that way. While I am heavier I still have some what of a slim appearance; that tells me that the little bit that I am doing at the gym (once or twice a week) works. What doesn’t work is what I’m putting into my mouth.

In fact (now my favorite segway, so if I say it a lot sorry y’all) last night I had a Whopper with cheese and bacon, and fries on the side. And it was good – but it wasn’t great. And as much as I want to deny this — it wasn’t worth it. At all.

keepgoing

even when you want to stop

That’s why today I started fresh. A lot of water, an energy drink, pork rinds instead of chips (less calories true life) , chicken tenders with veggies and baked beans; tonight I plan on having Turkey with Veggies or just a protein shake after the gym.

 

I know I’m not the only one out there that has to constantly start over – but the main thing about starting over is that your not giving up. Frankly, I’m motivated to keep going, I deserve to be happy with my self. I will do right by my body and health – with a couple of wine glasses on the way, but I’m going to do it. Real talk ’cause I’m motivated.

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